They say opposites attract. However, It is important that in a relationship you should find some kind of common ground if you want to build a relationship that will last. You will have a stronger connection with your other half if the values between both of you are shared. I am not saying that you have to mould your partner into another “you”. What I am saying is that create a relationship where you can see both of you spending your lives together. To better understand what kind of values or insights both of you may share or may not share, take a look at the following below:
You Surround Yourself With What?
While you may think your surroundings shouldn’t matter, it does. It is important because your other half will eventually become a part of your surroundings. Think about it. Think of your life style? How do you like your home space to be furnished? Are you a city life person or are you the person who would prefer to live in the country. What are the possessions that you value the most? Let these things sink in your mind… It will help the both of you realize if you are compatible with one another once you start wanting to live together.
You Spend Your Time, How?
I have to admit, I tend to prioritize myself with my own needs. I believe this is where most relationships experience falling short. When one gives more time to what is more important to themselves. But that is not how it should work. In a relationship, you need to also allocate time spent with your other half. It is important to know that your significant other also needs your attention and time. I think you need to re-think your commitment if you are having difficulty making time for him or her. In my case… her.
Finances, How Do You Manage It?
Oh for the love of money. This is where a lot of relationships fail. This is where the burst of anger tends to happen. What may be important for you to buy may not be for your partner. Some of you may be stuck in the YOLO life. Whereas the other is saving up for the long term goals, such as a home, important bills, even retirement. Sometimes these values don’t share common ground. But you need to compromise. Example, one spends less while the other saves a little more.
What Are Your Future Plans and Goals?
If you are thinking of having someone be a part of your future, then obviously you should share what you have planned in your future with them as well. Whether it’s your dreams or goals you want to achieve. It all matters. Why? Because you would want support coming from your other half making you feel like you can achieve and fulfill them. Plenty of times there are people who get into relationships, and once they finally settle down with each other they learn that they are not appreciative of their goals they are trying to make a reality or choices in their careers. You wouldn’t want to put strain on your relationships that’s why it is important that both of you support each others future plans. Don’t just say you do.
How Open Are You About Your Feelings?
Everyone has different ways of expressing their feelings. Some like to talk it out. I, for one like to have my space and write out all my feelings. Some take breaks from the relationship to help get things into perspective, while others feel dependent, emotionally to their significant others and want to discuss everything. I learned from experience that this can be a rough situation because when you know that your partner is stressing out and wants to discuss it with you and you’re the type who rather not talk (at the moment) and it just drives them crazy. But, that may be because you feel overwhelmed with your partner and feel like you just need the space. This also calls for compromising. How? One can express their emotions and feelings occasionally and the other can give space to breathe.
My End Result:
I have had my share of the dating scene. Been in and out of relationships. But not once, was I able to be myself and be open to my partner until now. I can say that I am lucky to find someone who shares common goals and future plans with me. One who knows how to compromise when it is needed. But not all things are rainbows and unicorns. We still fall short sometimes. But we always find common ground. We are both supportive with all aspects of each others lives. Oh! and she loves food just as much as I do! That’s a plus!
